Despair vs. Hope

No one is immune to the effects of despair.

Money, fame, success (however it is defined), health, strength, friends, family – none of these things can insulate the soul from the inevitable encounter with despair.  Observe the people who commit suicide – many are famous, beautiful, rich, and young.  It would seem that they have everything to live for, and yet, they did not feel they could go on.

Merriam-Webster Online defines despair as the loss of all hope or confidence.

Repeated failures to achieve success or maintain relationships, or even to accomplish personal goals in day to day life, can lead to a feeling of despair – a belief that things will never look up, that you will never see daylight.  In other words, the loss of all hope or confidence.

Every person reading this blog has heard the knock of despair upon the door of his or her consciousness.  We have all heard that whispered suggestion in our minds that perhaps we were wrong about ourselves, wrong about others, and perhaps we don’t know what we are doing after all. 

Sometimes the despair is exacerbated by physiological factors such food choices, lack of sleep, or lack of exercise.

Sometimes despair is felt when contrasting one’s own life circumstances to those of others whom we deem to be examples.  Comparison of ourselves to others is a tricky and dangerous baseline.  The comparisons are usually not valid, even if we feel they should be.

Sometimes the despair is a result of extended isolation or loneliness.

The key to surviving despair-- whether you are a famous person, a rich person, or a lonely person – is to be able to believe that the despair is temporary, in the same way that storm clouds are temporary.  Physical storms come and go, bringing clouds, rain and lightning.  Emotional storms also come and go, bringing despair, anger, discouragement – but if we can wait the storms out, and not lose hope or faith, the storms will pass. 

The despair need not be permanent. 

Sometimes all we need is one more day to see things differently.  Sometimes a phone call, or a song, or a movie, or book can lift the shades of discouragement and despair, allowing the light of hope to shine through.

Despair cannot flourish in the presence of hope.

 

So if despair is knocking on your door today, don’t answer it.  Don’t argue.  Don’t engage.  Simply wait.  Wait for another day, another hour, another minute. 

Because as long as we have life, hope can arrive at any moment, banishing despair.